we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
