are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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