Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
