His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
