I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
