i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
the gays at disneyland are vicious
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
