I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
