Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
