Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
