i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
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