clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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