I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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