can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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