it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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