I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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