your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Randomize
