I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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