At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Help. Why am I so naked?
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