I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
