and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
