I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I intend to get homeless drunk
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
