I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
