I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
