Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
