I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
