I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
she pinky promised me she was 18
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
