You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
