Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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