I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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