that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
