this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
