I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
