If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
