Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
