Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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