watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
You're like the curious george of whores
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
