Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
are you so shy because you have an std?
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
You were trust falling into bushes
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
