Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
