and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
