just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
