He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
