the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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