I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
