omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
i think my cat just said my name.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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