super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
