Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
