I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
