so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
