lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
