That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Randomize
