D3 body, D1 cock
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I think i got beer on your cat.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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